12 Mar Why I Should Seek Marriage Counseling
Why I Should Seek Marriage Counseling
Even If My Spouse Doesn’t Want To
The Answer to this statement is simple and straightforward, but, because of our misguided feelings, emotions, and way of thinking, many of us miss it.
Here is the short answer.
If you don’t do something to change and improve the conditions of your marriage, it will stay the same, and get worst over time.
Think about the physical place that you call home
If there was a leak in the roof, broken windows, a leaky faucet, and a toilet that overflowed every time you flushed it, would you get these problems fixed/repaired or would you let them go unresolved (hoping they would get better on their own), because you didn’t know how to fix them yourself or because someone else didn’t want to get the repairs done?
I would say that you would more than likely get these repairs done as soon as possible.
These are the types of problems that you wouldn’t want to deal with long term, because of the discomfort, aggravation, and frustration they will lead to if you didn’t get them taken care of in a timely manner.
Take notice on how you feel about not getting these types of problems fixed in the physical place that you call home.
These feelings, you must admit, is already taking an effect on you and they are also putting you in the frame of mind to get the problems in the physical place you call home repaired as quick as possible, so that they will not cause you any pain, frustration, or discomfort.
Here’s the most important part, you will get them done no matter what obstacle is standing in front of you trying to prevent you from getting it done.
So, why don’t you do this when it comes to the problems of your marriage?
Why do you not resolve to do something to change and improve the conditions of your marriage that are painful, frustrating, and bringing you, your children, and others you care about, discomfort?
Here are three reason why this happens.
1. You are fed up and don’t know what else to do.
You’ve talked to your pastor, read every marital how to book, sent your spouse YouTube videos that directly relate to the problems that you two are having, and you even asked them to go to counseling and they refused to go, for what every reason.
At this point you don’t think they will ever change, so you lose hope, and start thinking about putting one or all of these three options in action:
A. Giving in
B. Giving up
C. Getting a divorce.
2. You are afraid to rock the boat.
You are afraid to stand up to your spouse because of what they may say to you, do to you, or withhold from you.
At this point you are in emotional bondage, and your spouse’s control on you is real and powerful.
It wasn’t always this way though!
It started slowly, by you giving up your freedom to please them, while at the same time giving up you own wants needs and desires, because you didn’t want to lose them or the benefits that come with being married to them, so you begin to gravitate to one or all of the following three ideas:
B. Give in
C. Wish that someone would come along and rescue you from your bondage, grief, and suffering.
3. You are keeping it together for the children.
You don’t want your children to be in a single parent home, so you decide to do whatever it takes to keep your marriage together despite your spouse not wanting to get help.
Your spouse has told you over and over again that they don’t need anyone telling them what to do, and they believe that you two can work our your differences if you could just sit down and talk about them.
You know this won’t work, because you have tried it many times, so you decide to put all of the following options into action:
A. Give up
B. Give in
C. Look forward to getting a divorce as soon as the children are old enough or out of the house.
What if I told you that there was a different way to do this?
Just as you would get the repairs done at the physical place that you call home, no matter what the obstacles or consequences were, you can do the same with your marriage.
Stop believing that one person can’t make a difference.
If you do nothing, you are guaranteed to get nothing. You may say, I have done something and none of it worked, my spouse will never change.
Maybe you have done something, but have you done the right things that can get you the results that you desire?
Coming to counseling on your own can help you see things differently, react differently, and change the circumstances of your marriage to your advantage.
But I must say that nothing is 100% guaranteed, except for doing nothing, but even that has a very slight chance of turning out differently.
Your spouse may not want to change, but you will never find out unless you get the tools and resources that you will need to bring about change to see if your spouse is ready for change, willing to change, or will never change.
Believe that God can fix & strengthen the broken and weak areas of your marriage.
Your power and influence over your spouse is limited, due to various reason, but God’s power and influence over your spouse is limitless.
If anybody can change your spouse (that is if they are willing to change), God can.
Your heavenly Father knows exactly what it takes to bring about the wanted desire that you and Him wants for your marriage and all that is required to make this happen is for you to put your marriage in God’s care.
Stop trying to do the work in your spouse that only God can do!
If you allow God to work on your spouse, you will discover, in God’s timing, whether or not your spouse is ready for change, willing to change, or will never change.
Get ready for the challenge.
Are you ready for the challenge?
If so, I urge you to click here to schedule an appointment to meet with my wife and I who have been where you are at and made it to the other side,
We made it to the other side, because we dared to believe that God could fix & strengthen the broken and weak areas of our marriage several years ago.
We are ready to help you fix & strengthen the broken and weak areas of your marriage.
We are Marriage Replenishment Specialists who are fully equipped mentally, spiritually, and academically to supply you with the tools and resources that you will need to exact change in your marriage.
Marriage Replenishment (fixing and strengthening the broken and weak areas of your marriage through biblical principles) is essential for every marriage, and we have the right tools and resources to help you with this.