19 Feb How to Resolve Conflict In Marriage
The Color of Marriage Devotional
Today’s Devotion – HOW TO RESOLVE CONFLICT IN MARRIAGE
Today’s Devotion is all about how to resolve conflict in marriage. Even though how to resolve conflict in marriage may not be mentioned very much in this devotion, it’s still the topic that I would like for you to focus on as you take in the substance of today’s devotion. Also, as you absorb the material of today’s devotion, understand that this is, without a doubt, about how to resolve conflict in marriage God’s way.
What if you could hear everything that you said to your spouse through their ears? If you could, would you keep on talking like everything was ok, or would you every now and then stop talking because you felt the pain of your words in the same way that your spouse did? Would you then, start crafting your words more carefully before you spoke to them, because you now know that the impact of your words would affect you in the same way that they would affect your spouse. You may not have thought about the words that you speak to your spouse in this way, but it’s important that you do, otherwise you’ll continue as normal, not understanding the impact that your words have on your spouse as you try to resolve conflict in marriage.
Now, I know, and you know as well that it’s physically impossible to hear the words that you speak through your spouse’s ears. However, it’s not impossible for you to imagine and even sometimes know how the words that you are going to speak to your spouse will impact them. If you care enough about your spouse as God directs you to do in Ephesians 4:31-32 (ESV), you would be more careful to speak words that reflect the instructions of this passage of scripture to your spouse. Here’s what Ephesians 4:31-32 (ESV) says, “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you”.
You might be saying to yourself.
What about the times when my spouse says something that really hurts me? You mean I’ve got to follow the instructions of this passage of scripture even then? That’s correct.
Right in the midst of that painful event would be the most important time, outside of any other time; to practice the instructions of this passage of scripture. It’s easy to practice putting this passage of scripture into action when there’s little to no resistance, which is why it’s important to apply these instructions when you’re least likely to want to do so. Doing this will help you follow the instructions that are given to you in 2 Peter 1:3-8, here is what it says,
“3 His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence, 4 by which he has granted to us his precious and very great promises, so that through them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped from the corruption that is in the world because of sinful desire. 5 For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, and virtue with knowledge, 6 and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness, 7 and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love. 8 For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.”
If you want the qualities of Christ to flow through you in the good and bad moments of your marriage you must be willing to put the instructions of the Word of God into action even when you don’t want to do so. This is where Galatians 5:16(ESV), comes into play. This passage of scripture is the secret to overcoming the desires of your carnal nature that compels you to override the instructions of the Word of God. Your carnal nature will have you saying to yourself, things like, “you don’t have to take that”, you’re not going to let him or her speak to you like that, are you?”, “he or she just made you look like a fool’, “that’s not fair”, among other more ungodly thoughts that you might have that I won’t mention in today’s devotion, but you more than likely know what I’m talking about.
Galatians 5:16 (ESV) says, “But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh”. If you want to overcome the pull of your carnal nature, you will have to practice doing what the Holy Spirit will tell you to do and also empower you to do if you ask Him and you’re willing to do so. This is how to put the instructions of Ephesians 4:31-32 and any other passage of scripture that God gives to you to put into action to resolve conflict in marriage God’s way.
Here are the short steps to how to resolve conflict in marriage God’s way.
1. Follow the instructions given to you in Ephesians 4:31-32
Ask God to help you release anger, bitterness, and anything else that’s preventing you from having a tender heart and a forgiving spirit towards your spouse as you learn how to resolve conflict in marriage God’s way.
2. Follow the instructions given to you in 2 Peter 1:3-8
Realize that you have been granted the ability, through God’s divine power, to overcome your sinful desires, that come from your carnal nature; that will cause you to react in an ungodly manner during the difficult and painful moments of your marriage. This can only happen when you do the work that is required that is mentioned in 2 Peter 1:5-7.
3. Follow the instructions given to you in Galatians 5:16
You must first resist the urge to defend yourself in the flesh by asking the Holy Spirit to empower you to do so. Then you must listen for the instructions that the Holy Spirit will give you to follow and then put them into actions and allow God to be responsible for the outcome.
Key Marriage Scriptures for today’s devotion:
Proverbs 15:1, Proverbs 19:11, Romans 12:2, Romans 12:19, 1 Corinthians 10:13, Ephesians 4:31-32, Galatians 5:16, James 1:19-20, James 4:7, & 2 Peter 1:3-8
Next steps to take:
Be sure to read all of the key marriage scriptures for today’s devotion. Make an effort to understand and apply the instructions that each passage of scripture gives to you concerning how to resolve conflict in marriage God’s way. Make a commitment to learn other scriptures, such as Ephesians 4:2-3, that will provide you instructions on how to resolve conflict in marriage God’s way. We have a course that you can take online or in person that’s entitled Marriage Replenishment, which will teach you how to resolve conflict in marriage God’s way plus more, visit our website (www.thecolorfomarriage.com) to find out more about this.
We are here to help, we offer online Christian Marriage Counseling that will help you and your spouse learn how to resolve conflict in marriage God’s way. We also would like to help you with understanding and living out God’s plan for marriage so that you can build a Christ centered marriage that you can enjoy.
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